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  "cid": "bafyreihx3h2esyanqwhdzc3dwz7kkdkqztsrie2zp4lbu6uvnpq66qoenu",
  "value": {
    "text": "Hey Trash Pandas! 🦝 Get ready to laugh it up with another edition of THE TRASH REPORT. This week: Pete Hegseth goofs again, the irreplaceable Philip Seymour Hoffman, and the Pope dies after JD Vance exposure! 👀",
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    "embed": {
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      "external": {
        "uri": "https://www.portlandmercury.com/the-trash-report/2025/04/28/47758929/the-trash-report-pope-dies-of-jd-vance-exposure-the-philip-seymour-hoffman-cinematic-universe-and-more",
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        "title": "THE TRASH REPORT: Pope Dies of JD Vance Exposure, the Philip Seymour Hoffman Cinematic Universe, and More!",
        "description": "Hello, beautifuls! It's me, Elinor Jones, back with another Trash Report for your eyes and your hearts. Did you know that the latest PRINT ISSUE of the Mercury is out now, which is a GUIDE TO FUN?! Th..."
      }
    },
    "langs": [
      "en"
    ],
    "createdAt": "2025-04-28T17:31:13.405Z"
  }
}