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    "text": "From my notes on Adorno's \"Amorbach\" and \"Cloudman [Wolkmann]: a mountain that is the image of its name, a friendly left-behind giant,\" which appears in one of the 'socialization' poems in MY HERESIES.",
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          "alt": "Consciousness is respectable: it makes authoritative claims to knowledge based on standards of evidence. “To be conscious is to know feeling (or feel knowing) at a distance, to always maintain a scholarly reserve and perplexity even towards that which would appear most intimate,” writes Gary J. Shipley. This is the basis of neutrality which disavows the contingent nature of its preference in order to offer a definitive reading. The definitive is final: boxed, packaged, described. As such, it is ready to be consumed. \nBut Shipley maintains that “love is the unpossessable possessor of its own potentiality.” As such, understanding ruins love by attempting to realize it. Just as recipe books or how-to guides ruin the desirable creation by teaching us how to create it. We are no longer asked to imagine, but to follow a formula. The baked cake satisfies the taste-buds while trying to match the perfectly-curated image. Just as the relationship manual seduces us with its authoritative ideal of good relationships and happy couplings. What we miss is the experience of possibility: the encounter with what could be otherwise. \n“There remains in me an obsessive desire to save uninterrupted in description, in the form of memory, what happens— or fails to happen,” Jacques Derrida wrote in “This Strange Institution Called Literature.” In the same essay, Derrida evokes the ellipsis of early years in  the origin of the self: “the adolescent dream of keeping a trace of all the voices which were reversing me – or were almost doing so. . . ” involves the writing of what we vowed, what we pledge ourselves to meet in thought.\n",
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    "createdAt": "2025-05-13T13:58:15.784Z"
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